Monday, May 18, 2015

for tim

In 1991, Tim and I, newly in love, had just moved to Toronto. Very soon after, he left on a pre-planned trip to the West Coast of the US and Canada. When we were re-united three months later (an eternity when you are 24), I had my own home, my own friends, job and way of doing things.

We were still madly in love. We joined up some things but continued to lead our own lives with separate interests and friendships in addition to the ones we hold together. This is why it struck us both as so very funny when, on our wedding night in 1996, after all the madness was over, I got quite drunk on all the left-over free wine (our guests were not big drinkers; my friends and I got pretty plastered).

I remember sitting in the stairs at the Arts and Letters Club, in my boots and party dress, head in my hands and saying to Tim, "You do the thinking for both of us."

We both knew I meant pay the bar-tenders and the venue but to say it on my wedding night, after all that had come before, struck us both as highly amusing.

Flash forward 24 years, through an unbelievable amount of change and trials we could never had imagined. When I awoke from 9 hours of surgery, the very first words out of my mouth were "Where is my husband? I want my husband!" - and I would not shut up until they let him come to me.

With all the drugs in my system, the very first and only thing I wanted was this one man. There will always be so much more to both of us together and on our own but that I would say those words when I woke were pretty damn definitive.

Poor Tim. He's stuck with me.


FlippyO said...

You're both very lucky to have each other, and your kids are lucky to have both of you.

Nancy's Point said...

Hi Laurie,
I have a feeling Tim is happy to be "stuck" with you. Lovely post.

Jenny Bender said...

Beautiful post. I loved reading it, in part because it reminds me of the love between my own husband and me. I hate that, after losing his mom to ovarian cancer, he has to go through me, his wife, having breast cancer. But I know there is no where else he'd choose to be but at my side, and I would never leave his side were our positions reversed. I imagine the same is true for you and Tim.

laurie said...

Thanks to you all for being here and for writing too. It's hard to share but it does bring us together.