Friday, February 01, 2008

"reprieve"

I saw the doctor who works with my oncologist on Wednesday. I had decided, as I showered that morning, that I would ask to skip another chemo appointment, to give myself a break in February. It turns out she was a step ahead of me.

She was ebullient when she saw me. Dr. B. is the doctor who examined me when I first went in with my abdomen looking like I had swallowed a large watermelon and when a cough or a poke caused me to be wracked with pain.

We've come a long way since that day, a little over a year ago. Dr. B. told me that she is "not worried about me." I loved hearing this. She reminded me again how very worried about me they had been and said that I have been given "a reprieve."

A very apt choice of words, I think, and reflective of the stark contrast in my prognosis in late 2006 versus how I am doing now.

And, while she was very clear that I am "not out of the woods for good," she, like Dr. G. my oncologist, is hopeful that I will continue to do well for a long time.

Dr. B. also said that my liver felt "amazing," all tucked up under my rib cage, where a liver is supposed to be.

So my doctors are ready for me to ease up a bit on chemo, at least for the next two cycles. This means that in February and March, instead of going for chemo two weeks in a row and then having two weeks off, I will go for treatment one week and then have THREE weeks off.

And then, if my CT scan is good (and my doctors have both said that they anticipate it will be), we will continue in this fashion for a while (the scan is set for February 13th. I'll get the results on February 27th).

I am giddy. The chemo and herceptin, drugs that have surely saved my life, have also been grinding me down. Now I have a chance to heal and get strong again, physically and emotionally (and perhaps even mentally. Maybe I'll even win a Scrabble game).

It's good to feel hopeful. I wrote in my journal this evening that I am starting to get greedy, imagining myself seeing my kids graduate from high school and perhaps even becoming a grandma some day.

But I try not to get ahead of myself, stay in the here and now (not my strong suit but I am working on it). And be grateful for the fact that right now, today, I am doing very well, indeed.

10 comments:

Rebe said...

I am so glad you have good news! Thanks for (again) sharing so much. You inspire me.

Average Jane said...

That's wonderful news!

Mom2Amara said...

Get greedy my friend! You have come so far and you deserve to be filled with all that hope!

Yes, you're right - live in the present. But there's nothing wrong with dreaming about the future!

Congrats on a good appointment!

Anonymous said...

This is terrific news, Laurie!
I'm really happy for you :-)

Anonymous said...

HA! - I am so proud of you!
And happy too!
LR

Mary P Jones (MPJ) said...

Yay! I'm so happy for the good news!

Anonymous said...

I am very happy to hear such wonderful news. yeah for you

Anonymous said...

Oh, hooray! I am very very happy for you, and wish you nothing but more.

Babz Rawls Ivy said...

You Go Girl! You better dream about seeing your kids graduate and get married. You better dream about becoming a fine ass-grandmama. I certainly see you that fabulous!

My heart is so big for you! So big!

ALF said...

Found your site from Shamelessly Sassy's - just wanted to say hi!

Horray for good news!