reluctantly gluten free

Last fall, I got tired of feeling crummy all the time. I'm sure the fatigue and the gastrointestinal issues were exacerbated by the round of antibiotics I'd had to go on after my surgery but I just wasn't getting better. I needed to give myself a chance to heal.

In the spring, a cousin and her spouse had been on the Brown Rice Diet. Laura also happens to be a naturopathic doctor, so I had asked her about it at the time and got her to send me the info. It's not a diet in the weight loss sense of the word but more of an elimination of all potential allergens. For three weeks, the only grain I ate was brown rice. I ate chicken, fish and a bit of lamb but no other red meat and no shellfish. Alcohol, dairy, sugar and all processed food were also verboten - but I could eat as much of anything as I wanted.

At the end of the first week, I was ready to chew off a limb. Despite consuming lots of food, I was hungry and irritable. I almost gave up. Instead, I increased my protein intake and two days later I felt flat out amazing. I had tons of energy, no cravings at all (I sat in front of a table full of wine, chocolate and cheese at book club and sipped sparkling water, not minding at all). I lost 10lbs, which I'm told was water weight, as I let go of sugar induced inflammation.

At the end of three weeks, I reintroduced grains, like quinoa that don't contain gluten. I was fine.

I introduced bread and got sick. My son was also ill, so I decided it might be a coincidence, and that I should take gluten out of my diet and reintroduce it later.

I had no reaction when I reintroduced yogurt. Or cheese. I re-introduced gluten and got sick again.

Over the holidays (Chanukah, Christmas, New Year's...) I ate pretty much whatever I wanted. I felt sluggish, bloated and irritable and by the new year, was ready to eliminate gluten again.

After a couple of weeks, I didn't feel fantastic but I didn't feel terrible. Mostly, I was irritated that I couldn't eat gluten. I missed Tim's home-made bread. I missed the chocolate cookies from the Wild Oat. I missed beer. I started to wonder if there was a point to all the deprivation.

Then came Tim's birthday and I decided to make Too Much Chocolate Cake. And, after three weeks without gluten, I had a giant slice. Then I had another one the next day. And the day after that, I was  a mess. My distress was not so much gastrointestinal as emotional. I was irritable angry furious. I was depressed. I was in despair. It was awful. And then, suddenly, it was over. I felt fine again.

So the gluten is gone for good (Tim says that the scientist in him would love to give me a slice of chocolate cake, just to see what happens but, out of self-preservation, he thinks that would be a bad idea).

I'm still figuring out what it means to be gluten free. Sometimes, I'm surprised by how easy it is. Other times, I feel frustrated that it feels complicated.

I don't feel amazing.. To do that, I guess I'd have to cut out the alcohol, sugar and processed stuff. Maybe that's next but for now, I'll just try and keep it to a minimum.

what did i do wrong?

OK internet, help me out here:

I've been looking for a recipe for healthy snack bars, to replace store bought "chewy" bars. The bars can't contain nuts or peanuts.

My nutritionist sent me a recipe for Chocolate Date Protein bars. I made the bars, following the recipe exactly and ended up with a very, very tasty paste - too sticky to be rolled into balls, let alone made into bars.

She's away indefinitely and I can't find a comparable recipe online. Can someone figure out how to give these bars more integrity?

I used ground hemp. Could that be the problem? Is it possible to buy whole seeds? Would that help?

I don't want to post someone's recipe online but you soak the dates and then blend them with the cocoa and sweetener and then add the hemp seeds for a few seconds at the end. There's no cooking - you just chill it in the fridge.

Thoughts?

I'm also in the market for healthy and nut-free snack bar recipes. Any thoughts there would be appreciated as well.

brain slurry and eye candy

I seem to still be recovering from the weekend, with a brain full of mush. For those new readers I picked up after my post on Angelina Jolie - you might want to come back tomorrow.

Here's some of the random slurry from my brain:

Speaking of slurry, my 10 year old's baseball team voted on a name over the weekend. The results came in yesterday.

After one failed experiment, I made my own eye makeup remover yesterday. I don't wear makeup very often but when I do, I want something that will take it off without leaving me with more wrinkles and fewer eyelashes. My second try yielded great results - Burt's Bees baby wash, olive oil and water. It wasn't an original recipe or anything, I'm just thrilled that I was able to avoid buying a small, expensive bottle of something I was convinced I could make myself.

Finally, we had our Mothers' Day on Sunday (delayed because half the family was at the Toronto Comic Arts Festival last weekend). Pancakes and Star Trek Into Darkness were my two requests and they were happily fulfilled. The pancakes were delicious and the movie had Zachary Quinto, Simon Pegg and Benedict Cumberbatch. 
I loved every single second of Star Trek...

SPOILER ALERT!!

It was fun, fast-paced and had snappy dialogue and lots of nostalgia. Also did I mention Zachary Quinto, Simon Pegg and Benedict Cumberbatch? 
It wasn't until I got home that I started to brood about the fact that there don't seem to be any women running Starfleet. And the movie fails the Bechdel test.
At the time, I didn't even notice. I blame it on Quinto, Pegg and Cumberbatch.

it's not easy be(com)ing green

"You know what would make this kale smoothie better? Get rid of the kale."

-Tim, March 9, 2013

"I've added flax to my green smoothie. Now, all I need is a protein."

"Like a side of steak?"

-conversation between Tim and me, March 10, 2013*

Really unappealing but tasty, I swear.

A couple of weeks ago, I wrote about meeting with Heather, a cancer coach at the new survivorship centre. Her background is as a nutritionist and I have chosen to focus on that topic with her.

She's impressed on me the importance of making small SMART goals. I've chosen to focus on getting at least 5 servings of fruits and vegetables every day for the next month (after which I will buy myself a small present, as directed by Heather).  I was sure it would be laughably easy.

It is not.

Heather also gave me some recipes and encouraged me to try them as a way of increasing my consumption of fruit and vegetables. I tried a version of one yesterday with kale, mango and mixed berries. It was delicious but the blender didn't do a great job with the kale, leaving chunks of it to get stuck between our teeth (see first quote from Tim, above).

After a wonderful conversation on Facebook (it seems that lots of people find the topic of making green smoothies to be of passionate interest), I decided to put the water in first and blend the kale before adding the fruit. A video on "How Your Blender Uses Physics to Make a Smoothie" posted by my friend Hélène, was fascinating and very helpful.

Today, I put water and the kale (more than yesterday) in first. This helped my blender to be much more effective. I added fruit gradually, until the bitterness of the kale was masked by the berries and mango. I also added a tablespoon of flax seed.

The result wasn't pretty but it did taste pretty good.

I also found out yesterday that my friends have very strong feelings about their smoothie-making appliances. It made me covet a new appliance but Tim has rightly suggested that I should wait until I have a proven commitment to smoothie-making.

I think I'll ask for a Nutribullet for Mothers' Day. Andrea and others rave about it and it is the cheapest of the lot. It's bound to be less labour intensive than what I'm currently doing (I have to keep removing the lid and stuffing the unblended bits down). Also, there probably shouldn't be a burning smell when I'm done blending.

I'd love to hear all your adventures and advice about smoothie making. Recipe advice would also be welcome, along with other suggestions (what do you use for protein, besides a side of steak?). Andrea shared a link to the Almost Raw Vegan, who has 50 recipes that look pretty good to me.

*I've just figured out that flax seed is a great source of protein. See how little I know?

mental health day

My youngest son is home from school today. He's not sick. He just didn't sleep very well last night. He's been out of sorts lately - hard on himself and everyone around him. It just felt like a day off would be a really good idea.

We've a windchill of -35C at the moment (that's an almost as cold sounding -31F). It's warmer than yesterday but still not really warm enough to play outside.

This morning, I pretty much left him to his own devices. As per my stipulation of "not a lot of screen" (I'm convinced that watching videos and playing video games compound his bad mood, which would defeat the purpose of a day off), he asked me if he could make "pure juice" in the kitchen. I was hesitant but Tim said I could trust the 9 year old with a hand juicer and a paring knife (this is when I'm glad that the kids have two parents. The 14 year old would still not be leaving the house by himself). 

A short while later, Daniel brought me a tray in bed. He came back a few seconds later with a snack.

As we sat together and drank and ate, Daniel observed that food tastes better when you make it yourself. 

It tastes just as good when your child makes it for you.

I have just a little more writing to get done, then we're going to make soup (he bought a big bag of sweet potatoes for me with his own money, on a recent trip to the Farmers' Market in Guelph) and then do a yoga DVD. If there's time after that we may do a little spelling homework.

Or maybe not.

I'm having a mental health day, too.

sesame challenged

My younger son was a diagnosed with a bunch of food allergies when he was very young. He's outgrown some of these (eggs, milk) and some seem to be around for the long haul (peanuts and tree nuts). 

Among the most insidious of these is sesame. It was the first allergy we suspected and has always been the one we find the most frustrating. It's in everything - try reading labels on bread products for a few days and you'll see what I mean.

Last year, we were offered the opportunity to do a blood test that can determine the degree of reaction to some common allergens. Out of a possible 100, Daniel's response to peanuts was as high as could be measured (this allergy is not going anywhere any time soon). His sesame reaction was 0.84. That's barely a reaction at all. When Daniel had no reaction to this year's sesame skin test, the doctor suggested a sesame challenge.

This, as I remember it, was our experience:

Sunday:

2:00pm: Tim goes out to buy Sesame Snaps.

3:00pm: Tim tracks down Sesame Snaps, discovers that they "may contain peanuts."

4:00pm Tim makes own version of snaps, with sesame seeds, sugar, ginger and lemon.

10:00pm-2:00am I have insomnia, partly due to sesame challenge. This may also be due the fact that I discover my free games of Chuzzle were re-newed when we reformatted my computer.

Monday:

9:00am: Daniel and I arrive at the allergists office.

9:10am: The doctor explains to us how the day is going to unfold.

9:12am: The nurse is blown away by our home made sesame snaps. Apparently most folks just bring in seeds.

9:20am: Daniel's arm is scratched with a bit of sesame. There's a bit of redness (which might be from being scratched but nothing more). Daniel says that it's itchy but remarks that "it might be psychosomatic."

9:25am: The doctor gives us the go ahead to continue.

9:45am: Daniel eats a bit of sesame snap.

9:50am He insists that his lips and tongue are itchy and swollen. I suspect anxiety (we have never been helicopter parents but I can only imagine how he must feel after practically a life-time of hearing the message - from many directions - that a food allergy can KILL you). The nurse sees no evidence of a reaction.

9:51-9:59: I attempt to distract Daniel with hang-man, offer him lunch out and cupcakes as a reward if he sticks it out.

10:00am: The doctor examines Daniel and sees no evidence of a reaction. Daniel is still anxious. The doc holds up a mirror so Daniel can tell that he looks fine. He soberly informs my eight year old that he can walk away now "but you will have to continue to abstain from eating sesame."

10:05am: I tell Daniel that he can have the whole day off from school.

10:06am: Tim drops off Daniel's DS.

10:10am-12:00pm: Testing resumes. Ever larger amounts of sesame are consumed without hesitation or reaction.The last couple of times, Daniel barely looks up from his Pokemon game.

12:00pm: We are dismissed, with one fewer food allergy on Daniel's list. The doctor (who remarks that Daniel is "a different kid" now that the test is over) instructs Daniel to eat lots of sesame in the next little while.

12:30pm: We celebrate!

Anyone know a good falafel recipe?

what i did on my november vacation

We just got back last night from our post Little Pink Houses of Hope road trip and I'm just too tired to put together very many coherent sentences. I'll write more later this week but I wanted to tell you all that my family had unbelievably fabulous time in Myrtle Beach.

Here are just some of the things I did:

Had my first Krispy Kreme donut.

Discovered real fried chicken and North and South Carolina barbecue and banana pudding.

Gained four pounds.

Spent time in the sun on the beach, walking, playing and just sitting around.

Enjoyed the glorious weather.

Learned how to hula dance and watched a man swallow fire.

Read 575 pages of a book and still have 1000 to go.

Went fishing without touching a pole and had a glorious time.

Blew off NaBloPoMo. I was having to good a time to waste it hunting down wifi.

Went to a concert with celebrity look-alikes who weren't dressed in drag.

Had my first manicure.

Dressed up to have my photo taken.

Played mini-golf.

Learned that southern hospitality is a wonderful thing.

Met many wonderful people.

Enjoyed my beautiful family.

Went for walks by myself.

Relaxed, unwound and chilled out.

Felt supported, cared for, spoiled and restored.

"Lived stronger. Loved harder. Laughed deeper."

I am so grateful to Jeanine, Melissa and all the wonderful volunteers, donors and families who make Little Pink Houses of Hope such a wonderful experience.

questions off the grid

 Last week, I spent several days in a cabin on a very quiet island in Northern Ontario. It was bliss.

We were also completely offline. No phone, no electricity, no internet. I didn't mind one bit but it did serve to underline how often I have come to rely on Mr. Google to provide information. Here are just a few of the questions that went unanswered:

What is the difference between NASCAR and Formula 1?

What is the weather forecast?

What is fracking?

How do I knit cables without making holes in my knitting?

Who bought the Body Shop?

Why does the carbon-monoxide detector keep going off?

What are the health benefits of okra?

What are the ingredients in sweet potato pie?

What dogs are in the high risk group for bloat?

Are coffee grounds good for the septic system?

Is there a specific person assigned to travel with the Stanley Cup?  (The internet has failed me on this one! One link said there are three Hall of Fame staff who travel with the Cup but when I clicked through to the the article itself, the info was not included).

do me a favour: honour my friend by having some fun

My friend Rebecca died this week. She was all of 37 years old (if I've done the math right) and she had metastatic breast cancer. She was also one of the funniest people in my online community. She was also generous, straigtforward and honest. My heart goes out to her friends and family - the people she loved, wrote about and who knew her best.

Rebecca left strict instructions that we were to shed no tears after her passing (I'm afraid I've let her down on that front but I've been doing my best) and that, instead of a funeral she wanted a celebration of her life. I'd love to join the party and to hear the stories that those closest to her would be bound to share. Because Rebecca took her fun seriously.

I won't be able to attend the celebration (Rebecca lived in Cape Cod) but I would like to do something. And I need your help.

1. In the next week or so, please go out and do something fun. Do anything at all, as long as it makes you happy. If you need inspiration, Rebecca loved dogs (especially her pit bull, Diezel), cooking, eating out (her restaurant reviews were among my favourite blog posts), her scooter, her little car, road trips, NASCAR, kick boxing, books, funny movies and music. If none of these things appeal to you, please go out and do your own thing. If you like, bring someone with you to join in the fun.

2. Let me know. You can leave me a comment on this blog, send me an email (laurie dot kingston at gmail dot com) or message me on Twitter (I'm @lauriek). Just a few words to let me know what fun thing you did in Rebecca's memory. I'll compile a list and make sure that it gets to her family.

That's it. It already makes me feel happier, thinking that there will be a little more joy in the world this week. I think Rebecca would approve.

happy new year!

In 2010, I:

Made soup.

Started running again and kept at it (in fact, I did the Resolution Run 5K last night before breaking into the wine and fondue).

Started editing my novel. It doesn't really have an ending yet but I don't totally hate what I've written, so that's a start.

Found a writing buddy.

Knit a lot of dish cloths.

Played lots of Scrabble/Lexulous

Had my heartbroken when my dog died.

Went to Florida in the in the summer to get away from a heat wave.

Spent some quality time with girlfriends.

Organized a team for the Run for the Cure, called No Pink for Profit. By run day, we were more than 40 women and we raised more than $20,000.

Fell in love with Twitter.

Finally got a smart phone.

Learned that grief is not a linear process.

Spent a lot of time thinking about community, friends and family. I am very, very lucky.

For 2011, I wish us all love, peace, good health and many wonderful adventures.

more soup

Starring (in order of appearance): olive oil, onions, garlic, garam masala, chipotle powder, water, vegetable stock, brown lentils, tomatoes, yu choy sum (Chinese greens), lemon juice, ground coriander. Served with a dollop of yogurt.

Loosely based on a Lebanese lentil soup recipe from the Toronto Star. I was out of cumin so substituted the garam masala. Ditto on the chipotle powder instead of cayenne. Soup is spicy but very, very good (if I do say so myself).

soup

Starring (in order of appearance): onions, garlic, tumeric, ginger, coriander, cumin, chipotle powder, cabbage, carrots, sweet potatoes, salt.