Saturday, March 31, 2007

model mom

annecdote one:

The doorbell rang at about noon today. My young son and I were still in our pajamas. I answered to find a smiling woman with a Bible under her arm and a religious leaflet in her hand. Before she could launch into her spiel, I firmly but politely said, "We're not interested," and closed the door.

I turned around to find my not-quite-four year old standing with his pants around his ankles and a big smile on his face. "I'm showing my penis," he said proudly.

We immediately had a conversation about private body parts.

I do wonder what exactly the lady at the door had time to see and what horrified thoughts crossed her mind.

I was also wearing my Flying Spaghetti Monster t-shirt.

anecdote two:

My older son had the day off from school yesterday. We went out for a short walk to a nearby store. Inside, one of the clerks was admiring our dog. "I think he would like me to pet him," she said.

"Go ahead, he smells better than he sometimes does," said my not-quite nine year old. "He hasn't had a bath in a year."

"My longest stretch was from September until last week," he boasted.

I was back in the same store today, this time with just the dog. The store was very crowded and a number of people were lined up behind me at the cash. "I remember you," said the clerk. "I thought it was funny when your son said he hadn't bathed in seven months."

It's those little moments that make a mother proud.


Anonymous said...

And a Bubbie too! You've made my day:)

From West Virginia with love to all you fabulous jokers!

laurie said...

An anonymous Bubbie in West Virginia! Sounds highly suspicious. I bet next time I hear from her, she's writing from some other state, or even a Canadian province!

amanda said...

Ha ha ha...I just hang up nasty signs to scare away the little bible ladies. My dog is trained to attack at the first mention of the phrase "needing spiritual guidance."

Anonymous said...

Hi Laurie,
I totally enjoy your site. I posted my comments yesterday, but found out how little I know. I am a full time mom, doing a part time writing job. Totally new to the internet. Please accept my apologies for inviting you to visit.
I too have had the 'model mom' moments when I've simply shook my head in resignation of how far my life has come.
Children are wonderful in their innocence. They bring great humility to life.
I hope you continue to have great days.

Anonymous said...

Well, I'M proud of you, particularly for the Flying Spaghetti Monster T-shirt. Awesome touch.

Anonymous said...

Ha! What a great story - a penis AND Flying Spaghetti Monster shirt. Priceless. I'm sure your smiling bible lady was telling all of her bible friends to stay away from the Penis & Pasta house. Lucky you! We just never answer our door.