Tuesday, July 17, 2007

anxious

I've been feeling a low level anxiety for the last few days.

I'm not sure if I am unsure about my future, waiting for the other shoe to drop or simply stressed that my sweetie's passport has not yet arrived in advance of our trip to Chicago.

Last night I felt stuck in a loop. I can't remember the dream I kept having but I kept waking up in a panic, calming myself down and then having the same dream again. I woke up exhausted.

I was too exasperated distracted during the day by the antics of two nine year old boys ("Please close the door before the cat gets out. Please close the door. Indoor voices, please. I don't want to talk about vomit. Please don't talk with your mouth full. Stop spraying the cat with the water bottle. I really don't want to talk about vomit. No, you can't play with the paper shredder. I will give you ice cream , if you go eat it outside and leave me alone") but this evening the funny feeling returned to the pit of my stomach.

It helped to knit in front of the television tonight (although please remind me never to watch Law and Order, SVU again, no matter how desperate I am); I find the process very soothing. My mitered squares are perfect and relaxing (each little square is a satisfying project unto itself. If I never get around to sewing, I'll have 120 beautiful pot holders).

And, now I am off to bed (much too late). I am hoping for a dreamless and uninterrupted sleep.

3 comments:

Jacqueline said...

i hope it's merely excitement for your chicago trip that's got you feeling funny. can we go with that?

if you never get around to the sewing part there's always etsy. ("pot holders by laurie")

sweet dre***, err, um, make that sweet no-dreams-only-peaceful-sleep, to you. XO

Martha Mihaly said...

I'd chalk it up to the moon cycle. I had an awful night last night too.

Anonymous said...

I've had a week of bad/interrupted/quasi-sleep. I seem to dip into deep sleep for a short while, only to bob to the surface immediately. I look at the clock, turn Law and Order on (SVU included) which lulls me back under...and the system repeats.

Weather, the moon, tension around vacations, trips, travel, flying, all do it to me. Probably, once we get doing what we anticipate, sleep will return.

B In T